Im late on getting this post out but I had to take a mini vacay for some much needed away time. I thoroughly enjoyed myself and the fact that I have good people in my corner topped it all off. I’ve been so overwhelmed by my own thoughts and ideas for reaching my goals that I needed to unwind. I had people supporting me but still pushing me to get back planning once the party was over.
Now that I’ve grown and gotten older I’ve noticed things about the people around me that I hadn’t noticed before. Throughout my life there have been different types of people you surround yourself with, some good and some not so good. I’m going to help you distinguish between them by the labels I’ve listed below. Read closely because you could be hanging around the wrong crowd.
The Game Changer
Now these are the people that are about their business. They are usually always busy, but when it comes to lending a helping hand, an ear, or just giving some insight, they are sure to come with some knowledge that will make you think twice and “change the game”. Whatever game you thought you were playing or had figured out they are sure to bring you back to reality and help you along the way. They aren’t ones to make excuses or listen to them. Sob stories will likely not see the light of day. They give tough love but simply because they don’t have time for much else. They allow you to vent and will encourage you to do better but will not encourage repeated behavior. You never see them big packs, and you never hear too much about what they’re up to. One thing for sure these are the people to bring alongside you because as they learn and go up, they will be sure to take you with them.
These are the ones that help everyone when they’re down and will listen to you tell the same story over and over again. They are simply there to make you feel better about your situation. No doubt they are good friends but they can also be a hindrance and sometimes easily manipulated. They are a crutch. When you fall they are there to pick you up and patch you back together, but never actually fixing the problem. No tough love on this end, they want you to feel heard and accepted. If you are type to make excuses, they are the type to help you find reasons to believe them. They aren’t opposed to the truth, their purpose is simply to help you feel better about yourself. They can sometimes feel being to open or honest with you, will cause more harm than good. They rather keep you in good spirits.
The Pass Riders
Now this one has nothing to do with me being a flight attendant, but more so with the meaning behind it. People often ask about buddy passes and using your benefits when you fly as if being close to a person in that field gives them the same privileges. This is similar to this type of person. These types of people are all for your success as long as they can ride along too. You see this in the workplace, school, friends, and family. They are happy for you only when things are going right for them. They do this sometimes unintentionally. They don’t know how to function when things aren’t going well for them so they appear jealous or envious of your accomplishments. Even if everyone else around them has come up, it won’t matter until you do. Having that one buddy or passenger riding alongside them makes them secure or content in their downfall. The moment that buddy is gone they are alone and miserable. Instead of being happy for you, all they can think about is how they are left alone and seemingly behind you. The moment they are back on top, they are all about you again. They like to be on the same playing field or else they feel inadequate.
The Wax Figures
Now I came up with this name because it sounded better than “the statue” and because this group is stagnant. They aren’t moving and they aren’t going anywhere and they are content with that. These are usually the ones you share the least information to about your goals because they just won’t get it. These are ones you have mainly known for years and because of the history, you keep them around. You may have preached to them about doing better and even tried to help but they never once moved or budged. They are often offended by the truth and because you are at least moving (rather good or bad) they consider you to be doing well. They can often be confused with the nurturer because they are immune to excuses and naturally try to make you feel better about your situation but only because you are doing better than them. They know they could do better, but are often doubtful in their potential. Fear, lack of knowledge and effort causes them to stay in that same position. These are the ones you often grow apart from or keep around to make yourself feel better which isn’t good either.
The Secret Clone
Very similar to the pass rider but also very different. These people are actually NOT your friends, but they’ve done such a great job at manipulating you until you never really saw it coming. When you’re younger they are usually the closest to you. They take on your personality, your hobbies, likes and dislikes. You are practically twins! They appear to be there for you every step of the way but never with anyone else. They find something wrong with the other people you hang around and can sometimes convince you to disassociate yourself with others. They have a strong influence, but since you trust them you don’t see how manipulative they can be. They praise you for you accomplishments publicly but are secretly plotting behind your back. They want what you have and are jealous when they aren’t on the same level. They bring a negative vibe that you suspect is coming from everyone else but them. If you aren’t careful they will find a way to take what you have and turn it into their own. Once again these are not real friends and you should look for warning signs earlier on.
These are just the top 5 that I have experienced but I’m sure there are others. We all need game changers and maybe a nurturer or two in our life. Examine those around you, those rooting for you and determine who you truly have in your corner.